When I heard that the theme of my churches women's retreat was going to be shine, it hit my heart deeply. I thought of all of the times where I tried to make myself small and dim my light to make others comfortable. The reality is that the pressure to fit in or conform to some type of standard or identity whether it be to stay in a particular place or to be larger than life, can interfere with how God has called us specifically to shine. Ive felt the calling to write since 2016, I remember my stepfather telling me he heard God say "Start the blog" so I did. But through the struggles of life, lack of time, and really just overthinking how my writing would be received, I posted on my blog infrequently. God told me to shine but I struggled to do so and in reality I still do. I don't mind speaking in from of my church community because I feel safe there but the idea that what I write on my blog could be read the wrong way or judged makes me want to not post at all.
There's also the reality of writers block. It feels like a foggy day where I cant see past my own thoughts or even articulate what I am thinking. Today is one of those days and I feel quite silly writing but I want to shine despite how I feel. So how do I get pasts the fears and the fog?
I think the answer is to turn to God and process with Him. Whether it be writing, speaking, creating, running a business, evangelizing, praying, or anything He has called you to, press in with Him. Spend time wrestling with His word and what it says about you. The reality is that in a world of darkness the enemy will always try to convince us that we are not good enough to shine but the enemy lies. Gods word tells us:
You are the light of the world. a town built on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your father in heaven. - Matthew 5:14,16
God sent Jesus to show us the way and to give us the opportunity to be apart of God's plan to redeem man. You were created to be the light in the darkness and to lead others to Christ. Be encouraged to push through the fear and fog the enemy wants you to get stuck in. Even if at times you struggle to shine, never give up. Let your light shine so that God may get the glory.
P.S.
Originally I wanted this post to be a recap of the 2024 Women's Retreat for Vineyard Church. Long story short it was a beautiful time in the Lord and you really had to be there to understand how impactful and refreshing it was. To the staff,leadership team from registration, to activities, hospitality, and workshops, worship I say thank you. its our second year getting back into the swing of things and it was amazing. Every year we grow, every year we face challenges that in the end bring us closer together . God is truly working in the Vineyard women's ministry!
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